you have to understand

Note to Self:

When you say "you have to understand," you are also saying, "understanding is not a choice."  Don't get me wrong, there are times when understanding is vital, but the process is always multilateral. So, when Joel  cries after a toy breaks, you can't make him understand anything.  He'll have to discover it, sometimes painfully.  Next time, try a question.  Or just listen.

Sincerely:
John